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Eminem - Role Model

Album: The Slim Shady LP
Produced By: Eminem
Recording Year: 1999


[ Intro ]

OK, Iím going to attempt to drown myself

You can try this at home
You can be just like me!

[ Verse 1 ]

Mic check one two.. we recordin?
Iím cancerous, so when I diss you wouldnít wanna answer this
If you responded back with a battle rap you wrote for Canibus
I strangled you to death then I choked you again
Then break your fuckin legs till your bones poke through your skin
You beef wit me, Iíma even the score equally
Take you on Jerry Springer, and beat yer ass legally
I get you blunted off of funny home grown
Cause when I smoke out I hit the trees harder than Sonny Bono
(Ohh no!!) So if I said I never did drugs
That would mean I lie AND get fucked more than the President does
Hillary Clinton tried to slap me and call me a pervert
I ripped her fuckin tonsils out and fed her sherbet (Bitch!)
My nerves hurt, and lately Iím on edge
Grabbed Vanilla Ice and ripped out his blonde dreads (Fuck you!)
Every girl I ever went out wit is goin lez
Follow me and do exactly what the song says:
smoke weed, take pills, drop outta school, kill people and drink
And jump behind the wheel like it was still legal
Iím dumb enough to walk in a store and steal
So Iím dumb enough to ask for a date with Lauryn Hill
Some people only see that Iím white, ignorin skill
Cause I stand out like a green hat with a orange bill
But I donít get pissed, yíall donít even see through the mist
How the fuck can I be white, I donít even exist
I get a clean shave, bathe, go to a rave
Die from an overdose and dig myself up out of my grave
My middle finger wonít go down, how do I wave?
And this is how Iím supposed to teach kids how to behave?

[ Chorus ]

Now follow me and do exactly what you see
Donít you wanna grow up to be just like me!
I slap women and eat shrooms then O.D.
Now donít you wanna grow up to be just like me!

[ Verse 2 ]

Me and Marcus Allen went over to see Nicole
When we heard a knock at the door, must have been Ron Goldí
Jumped behind the door, put the orgy on hold
Killed em both and smeared blood in a white Bronco (we did it!)
My mind wonít work if my spine donít jerk
I slapped Garth Brooks out of his Rhinestone shirt
Iím not a player just a ill rhyme sayer
Thatíll spray an Aerosol can up at the ozone layer (psssssssh)
My rap styleís warped, Iím runnin out the morgue
witcha dead grandmotherís corpse to throw it on your porch
Jumped in a Chickenhawk cartoon wit a cape on
And beat up Foghorn Leghorn with an acorn
Iím bout as normal as Norman Bates, with deformative traits
A premature birth that was four minutes late
Mother.. are you there? I love you
I never meant to hit you over the head with that shovel
Will someone explain to my brain that I just severed
a main vein with a chainsaw and Iím in pain?
I take a breather and sighed; either Iím high, or Iím nuts
Cause if you ainít tiltin this room, neither am I
So when you see your mom with a thermometer shoved in her ass
Then it probably is obvious I got it on with her
Cause when I drop this solo shit itís over with
I bought Cageís tape, opened it, and dubbed over it

[ Chorus ]

I came to the club drunk with a fake ID
Donít you wanna grow up to be just like me!
Iíve been with 10 women who got HIV
Now donít you wanna grow up to be just like me!
I got genital warts and it burns when I pee
Donít you wanna grow up to be just like me!
I tie a rope around my penis and jump from a tree
You probably wanna grow up to be just like me!

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